Suddenly so much is happening around me / with me. That dead long wait is over and things are moving ahead.
One thinks about the future, about things they want and when it actually happens, the anticipation of it doesn’t quite match up to the actual thing. I guess that’s why dreams are more pleasant, they are much happier, merrier and enjoyable, once they turn to reality the charm kind of fuzzes out. I’m not saying you’re not happy, yes you are, but that spark of visioning it just the way you want (which always isn’t true when it happens) or maybe the real thing and the stuff around it is a lot of work.
I’m going around in circles, so I’ll stop this here.. I will write more about it when its done.
I’m happy and then little sad. And I’m beginning to think that I really don’t know how to enjoy the good things that come my way. I was not always like this. I used to live it! Now I worry too much, worry about how, when, what if, next. God ! I need to stop this worrying.
Speaking of God, I’m glad to acknowledge that I see the light of faith, a new belief, some unquestionable trust, something is changing in this sphere.
Also, I’m thinking about what is important? It seems to be the underlying question but now surfacing a little in my life. Keeping it simple is on my agenda and for now I’m happy and little unsettled.
P.S : writing really helps.