Today is where your book begins, the rest is still unwritten

I love this track and have been listening to it over and over again since i downloaded it. I was watching ‘The Hills’ and noticed the soundtrack and traced it to get it. Did I mention I love soundtracks, from movies, series, cartoons.. They carry a certain feeling that you felt when you were listening to it in the background with all emotions that the movie/series had brought you into. Mostly I love the tracks that run in backdrop for of happy endings, lovers meeting and soft slow kisses scenes. So like girls huh! Well, ya! ūüôā

Anyways, so my weekend was so much fun and relaxing. It was a good break I needed and the extended monday off gave me just that. Well if you ask me all the details then I don’t think I’m gonna pen everything but here are the highlights:

Friday¬† ¬†–¬† ¬† after office when to my Aunt’s place, it was my cousins birthday party and we had lot of fun. Later at night me and she got chit chatting till the wee hours and slept only when we couldn’t speak no more.

 

Saturday¬†¬† –¬†¬†¬†Stayed at Aunt’s till afternoon and then came back home. Rested a while and chatted with New Guy and then left for office around 4:30pm. Left office at 8:30 pm and back home.

 

Sunday¬†¬† –¬† Sunday woke up really late, close to afternoon and then went to GK with cousins and sis, bought cousin her b’day gift and then to the local flee market to pick something for myself for the DATE on monday with New Guy and bought something of sis’ choice but wasn’t comfortable it reflected who I am (not very sure of what that is either). She called it decent and flirty and I got nervous. Came back home and oiled my hair, put face bleach,¬†tried the clothes and ate sis’ head over which shoes to wear. She said high heels but I was no-no and then later after much talk I tried them with the flirty top and they looked good. although I was nervous that I’ll look all gawky and weird walking in them which is funny coz I do wear heels on occasions (clubbing and marriages). Btw the CAPS coz i haven’t been on a date in like 4-5 years now. God! I know!

 

Monday¬† ¬†–¬†¬† I got up late and started getting ready for the date. Washed my hair and to0k a long bath. Came out of shower and saw New Guys message that said ‘urgent! Call me’. I did call and got to know his friend’s mom had passed away and they were going to drop him at airport and all so it was but obvious cancelled date. I mean even if w could meet it would be the worst ever time right with thought of life and death hovering our mind space he wouldn’t even notice my flirty top. Anyways,¬†I was feeling like I was giving this New Guy thing a lot more importance than actually I should, considering that I wasn’t even sure if I would like to date him after meeting him or just be friends and all the shopping made me feel bit weird and stupid. So I felt a little relived that it was cancelled. My nerves were too tensed to be casual and meet him. I relaxed the entire day and chilled at home. Even sis stayed back (lazy bum) even though it wasn’t her off.

 

Last night I spoke to New Guy for almost 2 hours and inspite of my resolution to hit the bed by 10pm, I was talking to him till 11:20pm. I did text him to call be before 10pm saying I had a super early day (true) and he called at 9:45 pm. He was feeling a little low and I got him talking and we chatted over stupid and silly stuff and some other stuff.

 

When I speak to¬†him I loose track of time, really, we talk about so much and still there’s so much more to say. Now¬†I’m not sure if this is happening because I’m speaking to someone totally new who knows¬† nothing about me, or because we bond well together. Well, see if I didn’t connect to him then I wouldn’t be able to talk much anyways right, but also I’ve been so stuck up with the same people for so long that talking so much feels new and exciting. I hope I’m not making much of this to my head and heart (well can’t help that, I’m charlotte remember? Imagination runs wild). So much so, I’m leaving things to when we meet and how I find him, coz do I have my head on my¬†shoulders and know that it’s altogether¬†a different thing to meet someone than talking on the phone.

 

Now, that’s another concern, see I like talking to him and everything but then just yesterday this thing came to my head that things will change after we meet. I don’t know for better or worse, but they certainly will. Now you might think that I’m an ass who hasn’t understood the way life works, it’s all about CHANGE. I know, but maybe this is my lowered confidence (mostly due to chubby body and no money to buy fancy clothes with perfect fit) but I’m a little worried/concerned/doubtful of how this nice equation I have with New Guy will change when I meet him. I’m so comfortable talking to him right now, but somehow these well settled people with their parents earnings and no burden of running¬†the family¬†and their won handsome salaries to spend on themselves, all this makes me feel¬†like an outsider. I feel like I’ll be left behind¬†if I walk with them and¬†even worst¬†will be making¬†them feel ashamed to have me around. Maybe its only my insecurities talking. I hope. But then there’s nothing I can do to stop this change.¬†

We’ve planned on meeting on Friday and most probably I will be in my other office (in attempt to try avoiding giving the birthday¬†treat to office people, coz I can’t afford spending 1-2¬†G on these useless people who¬†don’t even know me at all and neither do I want them to. So maybe i’ll meet him after work as his office is also close by and that made me nervous and panick again coz then I’d have to dress for office and meeting New Guy at the same time. Now that’s not good, as it is I have less decent stuff and¬†also the new flirty top won’t be useable as that is a complete office no -no. Let’s see how it goes.

I’m thinking much about this all right? Yeah! but then I think much about anything.. so .. it’s not much right?

Trying to keep up with everything and myself… you stay around too and I’ll tell ya everything… meanwhile this is just the beginning and the rest is still unwritten. Perfect match for my situation! ¬†¬†ūüôā

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Filed under Blogroll, dating, dreams, family, feelings, friends, habits, Interesting, interpret, life, love, music, personal, random, realtionships, secrets, thoughts, Uncategorized, weddings, work

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