of old relationships and hanging on to what had happened. I knew this was long overdue and with more and more stagnant thought and memories I was like sitting in a car with no tyres and wishing to reach a destination – a happy place.
I guess its ok if sometimes your ex-relationship thoughts cross your mind right? I mean we are humans with emotions and a heart. If we have had someone in our life and shared some moments with them, then they will be part of your memory. But not moving on with life is something else.
I am totally over my last relationship, but the breaking of it left me exhausted, of emotions, enthusiasm, hopes and even trying to keep a relationship. I ran away at the mention of it. I kept myself busy with work and other activities and my family will always be my priority, so it all worked out. But then this isn’t normal, not seeing anyone on purpose, not that I had guys lined up outside my door, but yes I haven’t actually been there ready either.
So finally on last saturday afternoon, when my TV wasn’t working and I was getting super bored, I went into one of those Yahoo Chat room that I used to visit when in school. I think this was more like a destined act, seems like GOd wanted to tell me move along before I get too behind the times. 🙂 So, I kept getting many ‘hi’, ‘asl plz?’ and ‘want some hot chat’ invites and I kept ignoring them and adding to my ignore list. One guy actually sent me the first message asking how would I feel if he did stuff to my tits until the were hard. Now seriously he didn’t want friends! Anyways so after responding to few hi’s and realizing they were desperate people begging for hot chat, I responded to another simple ‘hi’. He typed respectfully without using words like ‘hot’and ‘tits’ and so we got chatting. We sat around for an hour n half or 2 and then we exchanged numbers. Honestly, at one point when he was crossing the first and basic guard of my privacy by asking me where I lived and worked, I panicked for a moment and thought of lying about it all and never appearing on this chat again, but then I thought why should I be so scared? I felt I much needed to take my chances, so I gathered my guts and told the truth. We spoke for few minutes on phone after that. I’ll admit I did look at his pic before exchanging my number. He’s average looking, someway familiar to an old school time girl friend of mine. 🙂
We spoke for 15-20 min yesterday and I’m trying not to think much about it all. One things for sure though, I’m back in the game.
I don’t know if this has anything to do with above events, but suddenly I’m feeling the need to get back in shape and take care of myself. 🙂 Planning on starting yoga and walking from today. Also already started skin care since saturday. Although it seems hollow to be taking yourself seriously for other person, but I know the truth is I had started lacking the enthusiasm of making myself feel good. I’m back on track now.
PS: Will meet him this weekend hopefully!;)