Monthly Archives: November 2008

My cousin’s wedding

My cousin is getting married on 24th Nov. We had the ring ceremony yesterday and i had a well planned leave to enjoy. Also met many cousin’s after long time and it was so much FUN!. My cousin who’s getting married, ‘G’ is the from our generation group and her marriage placed a flag that it has begun. The starting of weddings from our age grouped cousin’s.  Its an arranged marriage and the guy looks nice at heart, shy and simple type. He dosen’t look so good though and my cousin is really pretty, so ya that was a little not-perfect, but then a good heart is also not easy to be found, which i hope he is. I hope she finds love respect and all the happiness in the world.

It was such fun. All cousin’s together, chatting up, gossiping, leg pulling, pulling out embarrassing childhood memories of each other. It was amazing.  I wore a saree and got many compliments, rather 3-4 compliments again and again from the same persons. Maybe this was also because my elder sis has put on some extra fat. Else i am dead sure she would’ve stolen the show.

Nyways i enjoyed lots and didn’t feel like coming to office today, but ya I’m a responsible smart girl :)). Hoping to have a blast at the wedding and sangeet.


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My thoughts on SEX

I believe and follow that ‘sex’ can only be meaningful when you have some emotions attached to it. Now I also keep in mind that it is one of the basic necessities to live a healthy life.

When we care for a person, have some love in our hearts, then sex just doesn’t mean body, it involves souls, connecting them, making it something so much pure and beautiful. Every touch has love in it and that is what sex means to me ‘ an act of love’. I wold love to have sex (even the naughty types) with the person whom I know, who knows me, and we share a bond of care and love. It would be lovely to know that the touch on your skin is out of love for the person you are and every soft kiss tells you have a lovely heart. After all who are we, just flesh and bones?, No. we have hearts and feelings and emotions and all those wonderful feelings should be given a chance to live. 

Now i have been with only one guy(my ex of 3 years) and we had the most amazing time. And although we broke up and i haven’t seen anyone since but i don’t feel i need to do it just because its been so long. I can’t. It would be shameful for myself and disrespecting myself too. I respect myself too much to just land up sleeping with guys who wouldn’t even remember my name the next day or worse would only remember me when they feel horny.  I don’t believe in unemotional sex. Call me old fashioned but i simply don’t agree that just sleeping with someone you don’t have feelings for is worth considering. It doesn’t give anything apart from momentary pleasure( which is also not guaranteed) and guilt and unexplainable thoughts.

Also, ‘dating’ is a very defined word for me, it just means you are hanging out together and getting to know each other without committing that you would finally like each other. But i don’t do ‘dating’, and ‘multiple dating ‘ is out of question. I find it too obvious and set up. its like you’re desperately rushing ahead of time and giving hoots to destiny. And the ‘try if it works’ just makes it loose the charm. i am again very old fashioned here, but i would rather have a very magical moment of meeting someone, getting attracted(physically and otherwise), want to know more and experience all the ‘butterflies-in-your-stomach’ moments. It might take time, but i do believe there is someone special for me, who will complete yet another piece of my Life Puzzle. Please note, i don’t mean ‘who will complete me’ coz i am already complete with myself and don’t depend on anyone else for that. But sure, my Life Puzzle does need and will find that special person.

On the other hand, I love watching ‘Sex in the City’ and love the stories that Carry Bradshaw has to offer, but them being based on various non-meaningful partners is not so nice. Although she keeps trying to look for the right person every time. 🙂 But that i think goes to the culture difference.

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Yesterday’s drama

I was really determined that I had to, just had to get a tattoo done last weekend. So i told many people about it, to build a pressure that now i had to get it done since i have blabbered it to so many people and then told at home and got everything ready. I booked an appointment for Sunday with a renowned and expensive tattoo parlor. I took along my sister and brother (as they wanted to come) and had not actually taken a print of what i wanted.  now if you have been reading my blog’s then you know that this has been on my mind for almost a year now, but still after so much of research I did not know what i wanted (it a big sign to ignore), so i was thinking the artist would help me with some ideas.

I reach there late than the appointment time due to some cab crisis and they have already moved ahead with the next appointments (i don’t blame them). i was told it will take next three hours to start with my tattoo, so i start going through the designs and decide on ‘Pheonix’, RISING FROM THE ASHES is what i liked and thought it would be something very assuring that i can look at anytime in life, if ever i am going through a slump time and can take a look at it and think of ways to rise up from the bad phase/situation. but then i couldn’t;t actually be full heatedly sure about the design, then my sister insisted on a design, even the guy helping us said it was good, i agreed, the cost was way beyond my budget,i agreed and then we went downstairs to eat something and come back,but i felt so suffocated. Like something you are doing that you don’t want and i spoke to few friends saying how i felt. They all said if I’m not totally sure then i shouldn’t go for it. i didn’t and was feeling sad that i came so close to it and left it all,but then again at least i did listen to my heart and gave it time to love what i will do.

Then my sister gathered the guts to say she also wanted one tattoo. she saw a small design for the ankel and very expensive again. I was so pissed that i was not getting what i wanted that i put some of the blame on her for it and told her since she didn’t help me with it so i won’t either. she herself decided on something and now confirmed if she should go for it, then i said something terrible to her, i told her ” you haven’t earned a penny in 6 months and you are ready to spend 4grands on that small thing” she totally got pissed and said she didn’t want it. We moved back home after that and she wasn’t talking to me after all that.  well not that i was interested, until i absolutely had to.

Anyways, my sister is always like this, so extravagant and I’m always trying to save, make sense, sacrifice and she, she loves to spend, to her happiness and joy matter at the moment, even if you have no bread to eat the next day. She never tells me that i should/shouldn’t spend money( well maybe coz I’m always careful) but somehow due to the family situation, I on uncountable events, have had to tell her ‘not to spend so much’ and since she’s not working she kind of has taken this as an ego hurt thing, like I’m telling her that since you don’t earn you don’t spend ( which is exactly what i sounded like about the tattoo) but i don’t mean that totally, a little  maybe but that’s coz I’m a fair person, i like to think everyone should get what they have worked for. I hate this, the more old we’re getting the more complicated our fights are becoming. Earlier it was just about pencils, chocolates, then came dresses (still is), then boys ( i have withdrawn from this field now, she NEEDS them so much more) and now weird stuff like money, ego and all. C’mon we’re sisters, we’ve known each other for so long, and now we decide that we don’t understand what each other thinks. Damn! i know we’ll come back together, but i never want these so adult and complicated things to come between us.

Enough drama for one day!

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The extra 3 hours

that I will be saving from today onwards have got me thinking of what all I want to do if i actually have the time with  me.

Ok, if you’re confused, let me explain, I working in the long slouching regular 9-6 shift and thanks to the distance between my place and office, i left my home at 8 in the morning and hardly ever reached back before 8. That was then, but from today onwards I am back on the 7-4 shift( as i was once upon a time). Yes, i do need to get up early (5:30am) and board the cab at 6:30, reach my office desk at 7, but i don’t mind all this as i will be leaving for home at 4 and reach home by 5-5:15pm i.e before it gets dark :). Then I have the entire evening to myself, before i plan to go to sleep( which will be early from now on,but not before 11). This always reminds me that now i will stop bathing in the morning, instead i will bath at night. Hey, i am still bathing once in 24 hours, does the time of the day matter? and people it gets really cold in the mornings, its November remember??

So now I have extra 3 hours in my hand and yes i don’t want to be glued to the TV, so i’m trying to be creative her and find some way to utilize this. Maybe i can shift my jazz classes to weekdays now, lets see. But hell i am happy . Maybe its just becuase i hate that I’m doing a job that never excites me though i hold a strong sense of responsibility for it, or maybe its only because i entertain the idea , sorry have grown the idea that people who only do their job are boring to death and i never want to be that.

HOPE I HAVE THE TIME OF LIFE in every of those extra 3 hours!!


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The First chapter of my novel.


I have completed the first chapterof my novel. Changes may be made later but you the narration will  be in similar way.

  Let me know how you find it. Would love to hear from you’all.


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Starting today..

I am making a commitment to myself, the person who deserves to live life that she wants & who is worthy of every bit of happiness in this world.

I am starting my novel from today and will complete it in 3 months. 150 pages and 45,000 words in 3 months and all this along with my job. Nops, I am like most people sticking to the job that pays for my living and my in some small but loveable way does some help to my family’s finances also. But i will not leave what I love for what i important and not give up hopes only becuase here are responsibilities.

So this is it, marking on my blog to remind myself that every day i will contribute to my commitment, if not write then at least think, if not think then try to think. but i will.

3 months from now i.e 5 February 09 will see the completion of my first novel. CHEERS!


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‘Almost Single’ by Advaita Kala

I know I’m late here, the book was out months back and I read it now, but that’s not the point right?

The point is ‘Did I like the book?’. Yes, I liked it a lot. Though I could not relate much to the rather cool for me lifestyle of ‘Hotel Insustry’ (as you all know I am a software professional, stuck to the computer screen the entire day) but there was this independent and yet trying to maintain a family bond tradition phase that we all young girls are hanging in right now. I loved the the flow and description of events, very unreal but yet believable, it was something like I know I will never do, but yes believe that once in a blue-moon I might get caught into. There’s this real world feel to the fiction and yes the various ‘not so conventional relationships’ make us remember of all the non-conventional paths, relations and time we have chosen/will choose. There is the cribbing, but its all very positive. Really nice to read and of course I couldn’t love the end more, it ends with the hot gut proposing to the girl and she refuses. Its GR8! She does like him, and he likes her and yes he’s so handsome and smart and rich, but she knows that this isn’t all what a companionship is about. She wants time to know him and him to know her better and she is in a position to tell to him.

I thoroughly enjoyed it!

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